Monday, September 16, 2013

Gratitude and Ease

On Day Three of August Moon, Meredith wrote: Sometimes we get too caught up with life's circumstances. Count the blessings you've had to be grateful for this year.

I have so much to be grateful for and always have. I have a lovely, loving, generous husband and a beautiful, healthy, smart daughter. I have a new baby on the way. I have wonderful parents who are in good health. I have a gorgeous sister, whom I love to bits. I have so many amazing, delightful, genuine friends. I have a great job and kind, committed colleagues. I have a beautiful home and live in a wonderful community. I’ve been blessed with the opportunity to travel and experience many rich cultures and savour the finer things in life.

I am blessed to live in a city and a country where we have an abundance of natural resources, hardworking government(s), and tremendous personal freedoms. I am the grateful recipient of universal health care and public schooling. I can expect to live a long, healthy, fulfilling life.

I am fortunate enough to have access to the most incredible resources to make sure that not only are my most fundamental needs met but that I am well on the path to self-actualisation.

I live a life filled with love and beauty and creativity… and I would not trade it for anything.

On Day Four of August Moon, I wrote: What word did you choose as your travelling companion in 2013? How is it working for you? Where have the surprises been?
If you didn’t choose a guiding word, what word sums up your year so far? And why?

I’ve already explored a little of what the word ease has brought me this year. I chose the word ease as I wanted to build on the work I’d done in 2012 with the word savour. I wanted to stop pushing myself so hard and find ways to enjoy my life more. I wanted more self-care resources. I also wanted to recognize my own unique gifts – to go with what I would instinctively do – rather than question and doubt myself constantly. I wanted the comparisons with others to STOP.

I think that I’ve made considerable progress towards all of these things this year. My greatest challenge continues to be vulnerability. There are still fears and doubts and anxieties – as well as hopes and dreams and joys – tucked away in the deep recesses of my psyche, protected from the loneliness that comes from misunderstanding and rejection.

As sorry as I am to say this, it’s not quite as simple as reading a Brené Brown book and just deciding to be braver in my most intimate conversations. Some of the things I’m talking about are so well hidden that I am barely aware of them myself, even though they do continue to hold me back. So there’s still a little bit of work to be done. But it’s really just the icing on the cake.

Mostly, I see that ease is something I can cultivate and that can be extremely valuable for me when it comes to giving myself some space and staving off the inner critic and unfavourable comparisons with others. Ease has brought me closer to my self.

August Moon: it's never too late to dive in!

1 comment:

  1. Boy, do I hear you on the work it takes to release fears, doubts and anxieties! If only it were as a simple as reading an inspiring book, but it takes a lot more work on our part to move through the fears, doubt ans anxiety...glad that I am not the only one walking this often difficult path. Thank you for sharing your, as always, thoughtful observations =-)