Monday, January 6, 2014
My entire being is in limbo. Having wrapped up so many aspects of my life late last year, I am now biding my time until the due date of my baby (nominally: 9 March).
My mind struggles with this. I have things to do. I have things I should be doing. There are so many things I really ought to have done and now the opportunity has passed. And yet, a part of me knows that what needs to happen will happen. And, even if it doesn't, it will be OK. I am also keenly aware that this time is fleeting and precious. My daughter starts school at the end of January. This is the last time in a while that it'll just be the two of us while my husband is at work. So I want to slow down and savour what I can, while I can. After that, I really have no idea what life is going to be like for a while.
By body is literally full and ripening. As I write this, I realise that my body feels nowhere near as heavy and achy as it did late last year when I was schlepping it across town all day. That said, my energy levels are seriously depleted as I recover from bronchitis. And, as always in these situations, I am caught between the push-pull of a desire for rest and restlessness. Lately, naps have been winning out and that has felt like a major victory.
My heart is doing what it always does, and what I rarely give it credit for: seeking and holding joy. My heart tells me it wants paint in iridescent colours. My heart tells me it wants music. My heart tells me it knows beauty. My heart tells me that everything is going to turn out just fine for me, for my baby, for my family, despite the anxieties that keep me up at night (the ones that pretty much come with the territory at this stage in proceedings). My heart knows.
My soul is at peace. My soul has been seriously nourished over the past few years, guiding me on the path to finding my true nature and my wayfinder's calling. My soul knows that the path we're treading together is our own unique journey, however messy and meandering it looks. My soul is luminous with possibility.
I am responding here to the first prompt from #reverb13. You are warmly invited to share your own response below, if you did not have the opportunity to do so in December. Thank you for sharing the journey with me. x